We all know people who are excellent listeners, whether at business or in our personal life.
They always seem to know just what to say – and how to say it – so that we don’t get judged or disturbed, no matter what scenario we’re in.
They’re thoughtful and sympathetic, and even if we don’t discover a solution to our situation, we usually leave with a renewed sense of hope and optimism.
These people have a high level of emotional intelligence. They have a deep understanding of themselves and are able to detect others’ emotional needs.
Do you wish you could be more like them? Then you may wonder ‘how to improve emotional intelligence’? Read to find out what emotional awareness is and how to improve emotional intelligence for your life.
Table of Contents
What is Emotional Intelligence?
We all have different personalities, desires and requirements, and ways of expressing our feelings. It takes subtlety and dexterity to get through all of this – especially if we want to thrive in life.
This is where emotional intelligence plays a crucial role.
Emotional intelligence is the capacity to detect and comprehend your emotions, as well as the impact your emotions have on those around you.
It also affects your perspective of others: understanding how others feel assists you to better manage relationships.
What are the Characteristics of Emotional Intelligence?
Daniel Goleman, an American psychologist, proposed a framework of five factors that constitute emotional intelligence in his book ‘Emotional Intelligence – Why It Can Matter More Than IQ’:
1. Self-Awareness
People who have a high level of emotional intelligence are usually very aware of themselves.
They are aware of their emotions and, as a result, do not allow them to control them. They’re self-assured because they trust their instincts and don’t allow their emotions to take over.
They’re also willing to look at themselves in the mirror. They are aware of their talents and flaws and try to improve in these areas.
Many people consider self-awareness to be the most crucial aspect of emotional intelligence.
2. Self-control
It is the ability to control one’s emotions and impulses.
People who self-regulate are less likely to become enraged or jealous, and they are less likely to make rash, careless decisions. They think before they act.
Characteristics of self-regulation are thoughtfulness, comfort with change, integrity , and the ability to say no.
3. Motivation
People with a high degree of emotional intelligence are usually motivated. They’re willing to defer immediate results for long-term success.
They’re highly productive, love a challenge, and are very effective in whatever they do.
4. Empathy
Perhaps the most crucial aspect of emotional intelligence is empathy.
Empathy is the ability to identify with and comprehend the desires, needs, and perspectives of others. People that have empathy are skilled at perceiving other people’s sentiments, even if they aren’t visible.
Empathetic persons are frequently good at managing relationships, listening, and relating to others as a result. They shun stereotypes and fast judgments, and they live their life in an open and honest manner.
5. Social Skills
People with good social skills are usually easy to talk to and like, which is another evidence of high emotional intelligence.
Team players are usually those who have great social abilities. Rather than focusing on their own accomplishment, they assist others in growing and shining.
They are skilled at resolving conflicts, communicating effectively, and creating and maintaining relationships.
Read more about tips to increase IQ levels.
What is the Difference Between Low EQ and High EQ?
Here are some telltale signs of people with low EQ and those with high EQ (emotional intelligence):
| Low Emotional Intelligence | High Emotional Intelligence |
| Feels misunderstood | Know the link between their emotions and behavior |
| Gets Upset Easily | Keep calm during stressful situations |
| Gets overwhelmed with emotions | Have the ability to influence others |
| Non-assertive attitude | Can handle difficult people with the art of diplomacy |
How to Improve Emotional Intelligence?
The good news is that emotional intelligence can be learned and developed. Studies show that training can improve emotional intelligence.
As well as working on your skills in the five areas above, use these strategies to answer your question ‘how to improve emotional intelligence’:
1. Use an Assertive Style of Communication
Without coming out as harsh or passive, assertive speech goes a long way toward winning respect.
Emotionally intelligent people know how to express themselves directly while yet respecting others’ perspectives and demands.
2. Respond Well Instead of Reacting to Conflict
Emotional outbursts and sentiments of wrath are prevalent during times of conflict.
During stressful times, the emotionally intelligent person knows how to remain cool.
They don’t make rash decisions that can lead to even more serious issues. They recognise that the goal in a conflict situation is a resolution, and they make a conscious effort to ensure that their actions and words support that goal.
3. Procure Active Listening Skills
Instead of waiting for their turn to speak, emotionally intelligent people listen for clarity in talks.
Before responding, they make sure they grasp what is being stated.
They are also aware of the nonverbal aspects of communication. This avoids misunderstandings, enables the listener to reply appropriately, and demonstrates respect for the person with whom they are conversing.
4. Stay Motivated Towards Your Goal
People that are emotionally intelligent are self-motivated, and their demeanour motivates others.
They make goals and are able to persevere in the face of adversity.
5. Practice Keeping a Positive Attitude
Don’t undervalue the influence of your mindset.
People that are emotionally savvy are aware of the moods of individuals around them and adjust their attitudes accordingly. They understand what they need to do to have a nice day and a positive mindset.
This could involve eating a nutritious breakfast or lunch, praying or meditating throughout the day, or keeping a collection of good quotes at their desk or computer.
Read more about how to start your day with a positive attitude and healthy habits.
6. Practice Self-awareness
People that are emotionally intelligent are self-aware and intuitive. They are conscious of their own emotions and how they influence people around them.
They can also read the emotions and body language of others and utilize that information to improve their communication skills.
7. Take Criticism Open-Mindedly
The ability to tolerate criticism is a crucial aspect of improving your emotional intelligence.
Rather than being offended or defensive, persons with high EQ take a few moments to comprehend where the criticism is coming from.
How is it affecting others or their own performance? How do they resolve any concerns constructively?
8. Develop the Skill of Empathy
People that are emotionally intelligent are able to sympathize with others.
They realize that empathy is a strength, not a deficit, in terms of emotional intelligence.
Empathy enables people to connect with others on a fundamental human level. It allows people with different viewpoints and situations to appreciate and understand each other.
9. Practice Leadership Skills
People who are emotionally intelligent are wonderful leaders. They hold themselves to high standards and create an example for others to follow.
They are self-starters with excellent decision-making and problem-solving abilities.
This enables you to function at a better and more productive level in life and at business.
10. Be Approachable and Social
People that are emotionally intelligent come across as friendly. They smile and exude a cheerful demeanor.
They use the right social skills for the situation based on their interaction with the people around them.
They have excellent interpersonal skills and know how to communicate effectively, whether verbally or nonverbally.
11. Read More Literature
Studies show that empathy gets improved by reading literature with complex characters.
Reading stories from other people’s points of view allows us to get insight into their ideas, motives, and behaviors, and it may help you improve your emotional awareness.
Putting it all Together!
Many of these abilities appear to be best suited for people who have a rudimentary understanding of human psychology.
While innately empathic persons may have an advantage in this area, anyone may improve their emotional intelligence.
People who are less sympathetic just need to work on being more self-aware and mindful of how they connect with others.
You’ll be well on your way to increasing your emotional intelligence level if you follow these guidelines.
If you want to know more about developing empathy to improve your emotional intelligence, you may consult a well-known psychologist/counsellor via Healthwire.pk to satisfy your queries.
