Parenting has its own charms and struggles. Parents, especially new parents have to experience some cumbersome and tiring experiences in bringing up their child.
One of these experiences is dealing with stubborn children. And parents are often seen asking questions like how to deal with stubborn kids.
It can be mentally and physically consuming when children become defensive even while doing basic tasks at home and at school.
So this blog will primarily discuss the question of how to deal with stubborn kids.
But first, we need to understand the difference between stubborn and strong-willed children and then we will discuss 5 amazing ways to deal with a stubborn child.
And also if by the end of the blog you find out that your child is stubborn then please be assured as the research has shown that stubborn children are more successful in life at a later age.
Table of Contents
When to Call Your Child Stubborn?
There is a fine line between being strong-willed or determined and being stubborn.
Not every child who is expressing his will to his parents without any fear is stubborn. They are strong-willed and they have the necessary confidence in them which can help to make their mark in the world.
There is no doubt that they want themselves to be heard. But still, they try to accommodate themselves according to the situation. They will wait for the right time to share what is inside their heads.
And so they will understand the fact if you are consumed in any task so they will save up their ideas to discuss with you anytime later.
But on the other hand, children who don’t really bother or care about anyone else are called stubborn. They have their own will and opinions but they can hardly tolerate any change in that opinion.
It’s more like their words and their opinions are not likely to change no matter what the situation is.
This unwavering determination compels them to say what is inside their minds immediately and that’s not all they want a quick and immediate response to those things.
The stubborn children throw tantrums but more frequently and more fiercely than other children. And once again they are not going to tolerate any kind of changes in them.
Side: Know about these 10 things your children need to grow healthy and lead a successful happy life.
Causes of Stubborn Nature
Before answering the question of how to deal with stubborn kids? It is necessary to rule out the causes of stubbornness.
Experts at Bahria International Hospital say that stubbornness in children can be linked with genetics and the environment too has a great role to play in this regard.
It has also been observed that marital discords of parents can lead to children being socially introverted and can even give rise to aggression issues in these children.
Stubborn nature just like fear is an expression, not an ailment itself. The expression may take an explosive route and may come across as a sort of rebellious attitude.
So it is not always the child who should be blamed instead the parents should try to look out for such factors that can be a possible cause of the stubborn nature of their children.
Ways to Deal With A Stubborn Child
As already said, stubborn nature can become a difficult task when it comes to managing it. Dealing with them can be industrious at times.
But still, there are some things that you need to do in order to deal with stubborn kids and to get rid of their nature.
1- Communicate with Them
It is essential to communicate with your child. If you want your children to listen to you then first you have to be willing to listen to them in the first place.
As they are full of opinions so you should try to mend their opinions through proper communication. If you don’t get enough time to interact with this will create a loophole.
A child may have opinions that are good signs but they might not always be true.
So you are the one telling them what is good for them and what is not.
But as they say that it is easier said than done! So is the case here, discussing and conversing on topics can be difficult in certain cases so you have to be patient.
Developing tolerance will give off an appearance to your children that they also need to listen to your words which will help with their stubborn nature.
2- Give them Space
As already discussed, stubborn kids like other children often need space and proper company to vent their thoughts and ideas.
They might be fueling their minds with ideas that they can’t do right now. Going over the board is easy for them.
They may ask you frequently about something and if they don’t get their answers they might end up being furious which may come across as stubbornness.
So it is necessary to give them space and give yourself space too to understand their thought process.
With the passage of time either they will realize the fact or they will give up on that extraordinary idea on their own.
3- Present Yourself As an Example
Dr. Aijaz Ahmed, who is one of the best psychologists in Pakistan says that, before looking into the solutions to questions like how to deal with stubborn kids?
It is necessary for parents to have a look at their own doings.
Children always adopt what they observe. This is a natural process of developing habits and learning new things.
So you must present yourself as the best example that they can follow.
If you are continuously asking them to perform in a certain way or if you are forcing your liking on them, that’s a way of showing your stubbornness.
So if you succeed in making them perform certain tasks in your preferred way then expect the same from their side as well.
They will do the same thing if they want to get something done and this may give an expression of them being stubborn or rude. So you must be careful in your daily rituals so your child may not capture the wrong perception.
A positive environment is effective and crucial for their development. If you say NO to many of their questions then this is how you are telling them to say NO when they don’t get something.
Therefore it is essential to look out for these trivial but significant details.
4- Keep Yourself Composed
It is necessary to keep yourself calm and composed especially when your child is crying or forcing you to get some stuff done. Children have very few ways of expressing themselves. Crying is just one of their expressions.
You might have observed that children cry even if they are extremely joyous or if they don’t get the things done or if they don’t get food on time. So it is necessary to hold on to your nerves.
Understand the reason behind their crying over these things.
Just don’t jump to conclusions instantly, instead, give them enough space so that they can express themselves.
Also never shame them in front of others, as it may lessen their confidence.
Studies have shown that emotional intelligence is far more important than intelligence quotient to be successful.
So shaming or insulting or even beating them in front of others will not do any good to them and their stubborn nature.
5- Set Rules and Regulations
Rules and regulations are very necessary for training any individual. These rules will help in developing a sense of structure in them.
If they know that there are certain rules that are abided by by every other person living in the house they will one way or another try to accommodate themselves with those rules and regulations.
But the thing that needs to be considered here is that just like this stubborn nature develops with the passage of time, it will take time to break this nature.
Your child will break these rules and regulations. But eventually, he will try to channel himself to accommodate these rules.
Also according to research, rules help create a framework and structure among children.
The Takeaway Note
Children have varied capacities and they need to be understood differently. Perceiving things differently with their prospect might help in many regards. Proper care and communication are necessary.
It is a good trait if your child has lots of opinions and ideas of their own. They just need to be catered to differently. For more goal-oriented results consult the best psychologist. To read more on child care and general health, click here on healthwire.